Jane Ballot

Being me in the world

Friday 26th September

Tomorrow is D-day. At least, that’s how it feels.

It’s also the day I’ve decided we’re going to go on a family excursion. Without Sarah, as she is jolling in France. (At least, she’s playing her heart out at Worlds, but I think she’s having a jol too!) I’m not sure yet where we will go, but just out and about is appealing. We have such beautiful weather and there are so many awesome places to go that just doing it will be fun!

This time last year, I was in the final throes of arranging my big 50th birthday bash. So much can change in a year! As part of the party, Carl put together a video for me with clips of things that are important to me – and wishes from family and -friends. For the video, Noel described me as a ‘real Nike chick’, meaning that (apparently) I ‘just do it’. Amongst a whole lot of other things that were said about me (all good, fortunately – after all, it was my birthday!), that definitely resonated. ‘Just doing things’ speaks of impetuosity and, I suppose, a preference for doing / getting things immediately, or, at least, sooner than later. This I can understand about myself.

Fortunately, or unfortunately, life teaches us lots of lessons. I suppose I’d never really thought about it till now, really, but ‘just doing it’ could also be about just getting on with what has to be done and making / letting it happen as it needs to. A wise woman, my sister!

Dani asks me if I’m going to be fine. The answer is, of course, “Definitely.”

Those are not brave words, but simply the fact. I still know there is pain coming (the ‘gouge’ under my arm is testimony all the time to the fact that no ‘procedure’ is without its fallout) and I don’t think the next little while will be particularly easy. It’s just what must be done, though, so I shall sally forth and make the most of it!

And I’ll be more than fine. That’s just the way it is.

 

 

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