Jane Ballot

Being me in the world

Tuesday 7th October

(Posted 8th October)

‘Surrounded by friends and family’. That’s not usually the way one describes a stay in hospital.

But then, not everyone is me.

On the other hand, ‘surrounded by family’ was a great – and logical – way to spend my birthday weekend: dinner on Saturday and then Cinema Prestige on Sunday 🙂

Yesterday,  my actual birthday, began with a good couple of hours of reading, receiving and listening a whole whack of messages wishing me the best for my birthday and for my operation (this is definitely not just a ‘surgical procedure’). Then, the family came with me to the hospital – complete with ‘in-flight’ entertainment.

As Michael said, it looked like we were all on our way to the airport or something.

The day progressed with various members of the family popping in and the kids and Paul taking up some form of temporary residence.

Then there are the new friends in the ward. So my hospital stay is about friends and family.

There is, of course, always, the ever-present wound that is the whole reason for being here. I don’t have the courage to actually look at the wound yet. Maybe I won’t ever find it, although, I know I will have to confront that reality too, sometime – soon, no doubt.

In a strange way, though, it’s all okay. I can feel the pain and the ‘stretching’ and I know what has been done. And I’m okay with those thoughts.

I just don’t want to have to force a confrontation yet, though.


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