Jane Ballot

Being me in the world

Monday 10th November

I just went for a run. Well, a jog-and-walk. I’ve decided that being fat and lazy for two months, or so, is enough now. 🙂

The only problem is that running with even low-grade nausea is not so cool – exacerbated by the feeling that someone / something is tightening a clamp under my arm makes it a little bit of a challenge. Never fear, though, slowly, slowly I will be back ‘pounding the streets’!

Next step is to get into a boat.

It’s interesting how we tend to go through phases: mostly, I get quite angstig if I don’t do some form of exercise every day. For the last two months, this has been complicated by a few little things like asthma, operations, painful recovery, chemo etc – and I haven’t really felt anxious about it. What has bothered me more is that I haven’t been able to do the normal things – including carrying heavy loads out of Mum’s house and generally being like that Amazon I’m supposed to be.

Everything to it’s place, I suppose.

Anyway, the doc gave the all-clear to begin exercising again and everyone says, “Listen to your body”, so I will allow myself to dictate what I can and can’t do.

(When have I ever done otherwise!?)

I was talking to a friend of mine who hadn’t realised the chemo started last week. She asked how I had been and I told her about feeling kak last Tuesday and Wednesday. When I told her that I had got up at 5 on both days to make breakfast for the kids and get them off to school, it sounded a little extreme even to me!

That’s the way I roll, I suppose. 😉

I still get quite tired and need to find the energy, sometimes, to read the novel I am writing lessons about, or to write. ‘No work, no money’ is sometimes a good motivator!

Today seems to be the day for bulletins. My neighbour phoned to see how I was doing. We bumped into each other just after I was diagnosed, but haven’t chatted since. It was quite an eye-opener (so to speak) to me to hear myself outline what has happened to me in the last two months.

It brought it all home to me a bit that this has been quite a process. It’s not over yet – but, as Frances says, the worst is over, the next to be endured and the best is yet to come!




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