Jane Ballot

Being me in the world

Thursday 6th November

Day 31. One month. (Or Day 9)

I have decided that I must be way different from average… 😉

They told me that the average time for a drain to be in is 5-7 days. Well…I am now over four times that  score!

Hopefully today it will finally come out – for which I am terrified – but I am not holding my breath.

Every-so-often, we are exposed to something that just increases our level of respect for others in a relative, and sometimes similar, position. When Sarah started paddling for Parktown, I was her constant spectator and her greatest fan – and the best at shouting encouragement from the bank, which included useful instructions like, “Paddle! Paddle!” and “Move those arms faster!”

Then I got into a long boat on the dam – and my respect for my daughter and all the girls rocketed up. My ‘easy’ instructions are not always so easy to follow!

I am now in the throes of experiencing the rather unfortunate effects of chemo. And I have the healthiest respect for those who undergo any form of this treatment, but specifically for those whose treatments are much more intense than mine.

I have, literally, been nauseous since about Monday evening. Sometimes there is a little reprieve in the intensity (usually soon after taking medication), but mostly it is just there. This is not fun and I simply don’t want  to anticipate doing this again three times. Almost voluntarily. Then I think about patients who must be suffering so much more than this and everything falls into some form of perspective.

Which doesn’t take away the fact that this is rather kak to go through – as I predicted early on in the process. I remember telling Mike, in particular, that the journey will be a little kak, but it will be okay. At this stage, I’d almost like to say, “Define ‘okay’!”

But it is all doable.

I am hoping, though, that this will get better before too long. 🙂

I think in the manner of most people, the mornings are better than the evenings – things do seem to creep up on one during the day, don’t they? (Although, I must say that getting up is not my favourite process right now!)

Oh well, if I’m on some form of plateau in the journey at the moment, I may as well look around me and enjoy the view.

Everything carries on. Everything is doable.

Onward and upward.

 

 

 

 

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