Jane Ballot

Being me in the world

Friday 3rd April

Today’s Good Friday and turned out to be one of those ‘feels great and I seem to have done everything’ days that I enjoy so much, particularly on holiday.

I got up early, but wasn’t sure if I would go for a run, because we were going to church and I like to run and swim in my own time. I decided to hit the road, though, but in the opposite direction, for a change. It was a  simple run along the beach front road, which meant it was all flat 🙂 and it was great fun. Then Gran and Oupa and I went to church, which always feels right around Easter. After that, it was breakfast at the Hotel, then the beach. All through this, it was overcast and even a bit chilly, but it was wonderful.

Ruth and the cousins joined us on the beach, where we played a long, mad game of French Cricket, with a piece of driftwood and a tennis ball. This was after playing one / two ‘halves’ of our own version of extreme Frisbee (David, Michael, Dani and I), which was completely exhausting. At least, with French Cricket, you are not running and running all the time!

Then, of course, it turned to continuous cricket and the game changed a little bit! Still, it was great fun, not too exhausting and good for a whole lot of reasons.

On days like today, I am not sure that I will swim, as the water is inevitably cold and there is a wind and no welcomingly warm sun. Then there is all the running around and the water is just there, so there is really no choice.

And the swim was delightful!

I cannot sit still – well, not completely and definitely not for any length of time. Mum knew this especially and put up with me squirming my way through a lot of formal occasions (and some just ‘still-demanding’ ones) sitting next to her. Being that way inclined, I like to be out and about and doing things most of the time, which can annoy the family a bit, I think, especially when they are quite happy “jus’ chillin’ “ 🙂

That’s particularly why I like holidays to be about getting out there and doing something, rather than just sitting around.

Also depends on the weather, some of the time.

I think that characteristic has dictated some of the way I’ve gone about this whole cancer thing. I know that I could have taken to my sick bed and no-one would really have turned a hair. I could have played the invalid a lot more and depended on others and their sweet, kind natures.

Not me, though. I hate depending on people, especially for things to do with me. Especially when I know that I can do them myself. Also, not only can I not literally sit still, I really don’t like doing so – especially if I am forced into the situation. I will find a way to be up and about, out there doing things.

There is no other way to do anything, in my book. Including cancer. Including slowly recovering from all the assaults on my poor old bod.

Who would I be if I did it any other way?


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